{"product_id":"im-not-an-asshole-im-a-hemorrhoid-funny-tshirt","title":"I'm Not An Asshole I'm A Hemorrhoid T-Shirt – Funny Sarcastic Quote Unisex Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003e🍑💥 \u003cb\u003eUnfiltered Sarcastic Humor. Extreme Irritant Attitude.\u003c\/b\u003e Take workplace sarcasm and petty comeback humor to an absurd new level with the \u003cb\u003e\"I'm Not An Asshole I'm A Hemorrhoid\" Graphic T-Shirt\u003c\/b\u003e! Featuring bold, high-contrast block typography, this hilarious quote tee is custom-crafted for unapologetic introverts, sarcastic coworkers, comedy lovers, and anyone who proudly considers themselves a pain in the butt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhether you're wearing it to informal office days, weekend drinks with friends, casual backyard hangouts, or family gatherings where you love stirring the pot, this top serves as an instant gag and undeniable conversation starter everywhere you go.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCrafted from premium fabric, it features high-definition digital printing with sharp lettering and clean-line typography details that stay crisp wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🧵 Key Features: 👕 \u003cb\u003eRemastered Premium Fabric \u0026amp; Fit\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted from midweight 5.3 oz.\/yd² 100% U.S. cotton (with high-quality cotton\/polyester blends for heather, antique, safety, and neon colors), this classic-fit tee features the latest breakthrough in soft cotton technology for ultimate comfort and enhanced printability.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cb\u003eDurable \u0026amp; Comfortable Design\u003c\/b\u003e Engineered for lasting wear with a rib collar, taped neck and shoulders, and a convenient tear-away label. It is manufactured in the United States using advanced DTG or DTF printing technologies.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e⚠️ \u003cb\u003ePlease Note:\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHigh-visibility Safety Green is fully compliant with ANSI \/ ISEA 107 standards.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePlease allow for a 1-2 inch difference due to manual measurements.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePrint area sizing and final print colors may vary slightly depending on the shirt size, monitor settings, and lighting effects.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🔥 \u003cb\u003eBold Sarcastic Gag Artwork\u003c\/b\u003e Designed with high-definition digital printing featuring the hilariously offensive quote \"I'm Not An Asshole I'm A Hemorrhoid (I Irritate Them)\" in crisp, high-impact block lettering.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e⚙️ \u003cb\u003eUnisex Fit – Sizes S to 3XL\u003c\/b\u003e An easy, comfortable classic fit tailored for men, women, sarcastic friends, and humor enthusiasts of all ages.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e👟 \u003cb\u003eEffortless Casual Everyday Outfit\u003c\/b\u003e Pair it seamlessly with dark jeans, casual shorts, zip-up hoodies, or sneakers for an easy, laughter-inducing street-style fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🎁 \u003cb\u003eAwesome Gag Gift for Sarcastic Coworkers\u003c\/b\u003e The ideal White Elephant, birthday, Secret Santa, or holiday gag gift for brutally honest besties, brothers, office pranksters, and graphic tee collectors.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e✅ Why You’ll Love It:\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBecause self-aware humor is the best humor — and wearing this outrageous sarcastic quote tee lets you warn everyone in advance in total daily comfort!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e✅ Grab Yours Now:\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBring unapologetic comedy to your daily rotation with the \u003cb\u003e\"I'm Not An Asshole I'm A Hemorrhoid\" Graphic Tee\u003c\/b\u003e — where dark sarcastic humor meets everyday premium comfort. Click \u003cb\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/b\u003e and claim yours today!\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Pasimax","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":47690231808054,"sku":null,"price":19.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":47690231840822,"sku":null,"price":19.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":47690231873590,"sku":null,"price":20.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":47690231906358,"sku":null,"price":20.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":47690231939126,"sku":null,"price":22.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":47690231971894,"sku":null,"price":24.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":47690232004662,"sku":null,"price":19.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 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